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1. Conversations with tech. support
1 Tech Support: "What version of the Mac OS are you using?" Customer: "Word 6.0."
2 Tech Support: "What browser are you using, Netscape or Microsoft?" Customer: "Netscape." Tech Support: "Could you read to me what it says at the top of the window?" Customer: "'Global Travel Conference - Microsoft Internet Explorer'."
3 Tech Support: "Are you installing on a Mac?" Customer: "No, I'm using a 3.5" thingee on a disk."
4 Tech Support: "This has Windows 98 on it -- did it have Windows 98 or 95 on it when it was sent out for repair?" Customer: "I think it had Office 97."
5 Tech Support: "How much free space do you have on your hard drive?" Customer: "Well, my wife likes to get up there on that Internet, and she downloaded ten hours of free space. Is that enough?"
6 Customer: "I keep getting an error message whenever I try using the MSDOS mode in Windows 95." Tech Support: "Can you describe what happens?" Customer: "Well, I keep getting a black screen with an error message saying, 'C:\WINDOWS>'."
7 Tech Support: "which drive is your CD ROM?" Customer: "the top one."
8 Customer: "Do I hit 'F' and '8' at the same time?"
9 Tech Support: "Your password will be...a small 'a' as in apple, a capital 'V' as in Victor, the number '7' " Customer: "Is that a capital '7'?"
10 Tech Support: "Ok, let's try once more, but use lower case letters..." Customer: "Uh, I only have capital letters on my keyboard."
2. 20 aim to pull off hardest phallic feat yet
January 08 2001 at 07:39AM
Taiwan - Twenty Taiwanese men will fly to the United States in March to try and set a world record for pulling a Boeing B747 passenger jet with their penises, said the organiser of the planned event on Monday.
"We have received an invitation from the Guinness Book of World Records museum in the United States to perform in Los Angeles," said Tu Chin-sheng, who teaches "penis-hanging art", a Chinese martial arts style.
"We will send about 20 men, their ages ranging from 25 to 77, to pull the 400-seat B747. We hope to set a world record," he said.
On October 29, three of Tu's students pulled a truck loaded with 100 men for three metres in a central Taipei square.
Tu, 46, has been teaching Chiu Chiu Shen Gong (Nine Nine Magic Art) in Taipei for 20 years. He claims that hanging iron blocks weighing up to 300kg to one's penis or testicles can enhance one's virility and general health.
Some doctors call the training dangerous, saying that hanging weights from the penis or testicles and swaying the weights can break the penis. - Sapa-
